1980

HOLLYWOOD SQUARES-December 24, 1980

Host: Peter Marshall
Announcer: Kenny Williams

O: Kathy Thomas (homemaker and mother of two, volunteer and married to pianist working the Tropicana)
X: (Mike Baggett, English teacher at Vegas’s Chapparal High School, baseball coach and bachelor)

Round 1 Prize: Broyhill 11pc. Living Room Set (over $2,900)

Kathy’s first
1 Paul: According to Rosalind Carter, how did little Amy take it when she learned she wasn’t going to live in the White House anymore?
“The crying and screaming went on for hours until Amy said, “Knock it off, Daddy.””
Guess: She took it very well
Kathy agrees X
2 Gabe who Mike has fought his image as a teacher for years:
According to Man and Woman Magazine, in an Anfrican tribal village, what does it probably mean when a young warrior puts on makeup and starts dancing.”
“There’s a Peter Allen concert in Nairobi”
Guess: He Wants to be Chief
Mike disagrees X (Wants a wife)
3 Arte to block: Do they sing “Auld Lang Syne” in India?
(Arte replies in Broken Indian I don’t dare repeat)
Guess: Yes, actually a top song
Kathy disagrees WRONG
4 Arte to win: According to the Book of Weird, what happens when a Wolf Man dies?
“He comes back as a mushroom spore” (No Laughter)
Guess: Turns to dust
Mike agrees O (Turns back into a normal man)
5 Phyllis: At a formal dinner, how should you eat frog legs?
Buddy: “After they’re dead”
Phyllis: She was at a restaurant with her dog “Fang”. They got upset because Fang “wouldn’t eat with a knife and fork, because she absolutely loved those goldfish”
Guess: Pick ’em Up and Eat ’em
Kathy disagrees X
6 Greg to win: According to the the book “The Great Quotations”, who is famous for saying “Bolshevism is knocking at our gates. We can’t afford to let it in” Franklin Roosevelt, Winston Churchill or Al Capone?
Guess: Capone
Mike disagrees O
7 Buddy: In terms of radiation, is it hazardous to eat the luminous dial on your wristwatch?
Buddy tells us Radii once made a watch. No numbers, no hands “Just sent out a white light to burn your nose off.” They needed worm blood to dilute the paint.
Guess: Yes
Kathy agrees X “They Don’t taste very good”
8 Patrick to win: Wrong Way Corrigan made a name for himself in the history books. He did something the wrong way, what did he do?
Guess: Ran the wrong Way for a touchdown
Mike agrees O (Flew the wrong way heading to California and wound up in Ireland)
9 Pia to stop a five-square win: According to the fairy tale, the king’s huntsman just couldn’t bring himself to do something when he took Snow White into the woods. What was it?
“How old was he?”
Guess: Couldn’t leave her there
Kathy disagrees O (He couldn’t kill her)
10 Britt to decide: Do you have to pay income tax on alimony?
Guess: Yes
Mike agrees WIN!

Round 2 Prize: Pearl Grandfather Clock ($1,100)

Today’s Big Winner (Over $4,500):
* Trip to Kauai (1 wk.@ Hanalei Bay Resort, Airfare via Western)
* Puch Maxi Moped
* Joy Stevens Ladies’ Fashion
* Venture 7pc. Luggage
* Eumig Nautica Movie Camera/Projector

Mike first
1 Paul: According to studies, will being breastfed make you smarter?
“I’m willing to try anything”
Guess: No
Mark agrees O
2: Patrick: According to the famous line by T.S. Eliot, what ends with a whimper?
Guess: A Love Affair
Kathy agrees X (The World)
3 Arte: In France, you’d be called “”. In Germany you would be called “Schwenger”. What would you be called here?
“Leon Krafty, an expert free thrower”
Guess: Pregnant
Mike agrees X
4 Phyllis to block: It’s proper to give your boss two weeks notice before you quite a job. Acoording to the book of Modern Manners, should a boss give you two weeks notice before he fires you?
“very small office that stops on every floor” or on a map in their office “loosen your tack”
Guess: Yes
Kathy agrees WRONG (He does have to pay you, though)
5 Phyllis to Win: Do Hari Krishna followers wear anything under those orange robes?
Guess: “I Hope Not”
Mike disagrees WIN! (They wear traditional undergarments)

Last Time, they stopped me at the airport. I said I gave him another life

More from Ms. Diller

Round 3 Prize: Jenn-Air Convertible Grill Range ($1,000+)

Don’t forget that $100,000 tournament including…

  • Domes America Geodismic Home
  • Midas Van
  • $20,000 Cash

Kathy Starts Round 3

1 Gabe: In a large area of Europe, if you see a sign on a house with a picture of a green bed, it means there’s a room for rent. What does it mean if the bed is read?
“The person who just used the room had a rash”
Guess: There’s no room
Kathy agrees O
2 Paul: What’s the famous Spanish word that means silly, foolish, stupid, dumb and fool?
“Señor”
No guess “Tonto”
New question: According to research, who are the loneliest people around?
“Chrysler Dealers”
Guess: The elderly
Mike disagrees X (Teenagers)
3 Buddy: Is there such a thing as a kosher pencil?
Guess: Yes, until it gets greasy
Kathy disagrees X (Used by butchers to classify kosher meat)
4 Patrick to win: Who is responsible for sinking a ship named the Essex?
Guess: John Paul Jones
Mike disagrees WIN AGAIN! (Moby Dick)

Round 4 Prize: DuPont Antron III Carpeting

Mike starts
1 Paul: True or False? A man of the cloth gave us bourbon whiskey.
“Bless Him”
Guess: True
Mike agrees X (Elijah Craig, the “Father of Bourbon”)
2 Arte: The Chinese gave us spaghetti, gunpowder and kites. Did they also give us the bagel?
(Broken Chinese with Buddy)
Guess: Yes
Kathy disagrees O
3 Buddy: Back in Ancient Egypt, it was common practice to remove the insides of something, wash the outside stuff it with spices, soak it for 70 days in the salt solution, wash it again, wrap it up and then you’d have…
“It would’ve been be done with the new Chevette but they didn’t have one.”
Guess: A Body (after the honk sounded)
Mike agrees X (2 to 1 win) (It was a mummy)

Kathy leaves with nothing!
Mike’s total: $11,130

Plug for Pia’s new movie “Butterfly” where she plays a 17-year-old. “I skipped two years”

Images of game board based on original by FromEquestria2LA on Deviantart.

Hollywood Squares is owned by King World Productions a part of CBS Media Ventures.

HOLLYWOOD SQUARES (syndicated)-2/4/81

Host: Peter Marshall
Announcer: Kenny Williams

O: J.J. Tande (San Diego, CA, Navy wife heading to Japan, mother of four)

X: Jerrod Mink (Alma, GA, in air conditioning)

Round 1 Prize: Tappan Fridge, Dishwasher and Microwave/Range ($2,800)

J.J. first
1 Ross: Something very famous started when a guy named Paris stole a woman named Helen. What happened?
Guess: The Trojan War
J.J. Agrees O
2 Wayland and Madame: In the nursery rhyme, what did Little Jack Horner do that convinced him he was a good boy?
“When Mary told him she had a little lamb, he didn’t make a wisecrack”
Guess: He pulls out a plum
Jerrod Agrees X
3 Paul: According to a famous poet, what burns at both ends?
“Listerine”
Guess: The Candle
J.J. Agrees O
4 Vikki to block: Nothing in your home uses up more energy that this.
Guess: Washers and Dryers, but Peter means Water, Electricity, Gas
Re-Do: Electric
Jerrod Disagrees X (Hot Water Heater)
5 Tom: Did Jonah stay overnight in the belly of the whale?
“When the whale went to sleep, he snuck out the back way”
Guess: Yes
J.J. Agrees O
6 Fred to Block: According to the Boy Scout Handbook (Fred doesn’t remember his rank), what is a boy’s most valuable possession?
His bunk mate’s best possession was a “benoit”. “I Was sorry I gave him the darn thing”
Guess: The Boy Scout Manual
Jerrod Disagrees X (His Honor)
7 Margaret to Block: Where is Queen Elizabeth’s husband supposed to walk when he’s with her in public?
Guess: Ten Paces in Front
J.J. Disagrees O (Several steps behind her)
8 Phyllis to block: True or False? Some cultures think avocados make you feel sexy?
Guess: True
J.J. Agrees X
9 Jim Stafford for 5-Square Win: Does marijuana do anything funny to cows when they eat it?
He prefers drinking “If you smoke dope, you don’t get to throw up”
Guess: Yes
J.J. Agrees WIN! Peter adds, “They start wandering aimlessly around and start playing musical instruments”

Note: Had she missed, Jerrod would’ve gotten it by default. Just one thing I can say about that…

Round 2 Prize: Lane Backgammon Desk Table

For Today’s Big Winner:
* Trip to Islamorada, FL (1wk.@ Cheeca Lodge)
* D’Avila Men’s Wardrobe
* Pedre His/Her Gold Watches
* 7d Carnival Caribbean Cruise

Jerrod to Start
1 Paul: Why did the sailors throw Jonah off their boat.
“He looked Cuban”
Guess: Too many people on board
Jerrod Disagrees X (To stop the storm he was causing, God was angry)
2 Ross: His first film was “Love is on the Air” and his last was “The Killers”. Who is he?
Guess: James Cagney
J.J. Agrees X (Ronald Reagan, Cagney was shooting a film at taping)
3 Vicki to win: “You’re the Tops”, “All Through the Night”, and “I Get a Kick Out of You” are all songs from a popular musical show. Name the show
Guess: Anything Goes
Jerrod Agrees WIN! (Both Vicki and Peter have been in that show)

Round 3 Prize: Broyhill French Provincial Bedroom ($1,000+)

Each winner gets to come back for that tournament for the following:

  • Domes America Geodesic House
  • Midas Van RV
  • $20,000 in Cash
  • Buick Riviera

J.J. starts
1 Paul: True or False? Hugh Hefner has announced plans for a giant amusement park in Nevada to be called Bunny Land.
“One of the rides is Miss November”
Guess: True
J.J. agrees X
2 Wayland and Madame: “Who wore a blue shirt, blue pants, a red kerchief, a white hat and a black mask?”
“Sammy Davis Jr., but I don’t remember no mask.”
Guess: The Lone Ranger
Jerrod disagrees O
3 Tom: “The wise old philosopher Socrates once stated that you should call no man unhappy he has done something at least once. What?”
“Eaten Christmas dinner at the House of Pancakes”
No Answer (Until he’s gotten married)
T: “True or false? Studies showed that the size and power of a person’s car often reveals something about his sexual personality.”
Tom: “I Drive a Volkswagen”
Peter: “Well, it’s better than that minibus you had”
Tom: “Both are out of gas a lot”

Guess: True
J.J. agrees O
4 Vikki “The woman on trial for running a house of ill-repute in San Francisco has been sentenced to 90 days in a convent.”
Guess: True
Jarrod agrees X
5 Ross to block: “Cupid, the god of love, was the son of Venus, the Goddess of Beauty. Who was Cupid’s Daddy?”
“She’s been trying to find out for Centuries”
Guess: A Swan
J.J. disagrees O (Mars, the god of war: Ross “I Knew it wasn’t me”)
6 Margaret: “True or False, According to the book of Lists, Josephine often feel out of bed when making love to Napoleon.”
Guess: True
Jarrod agrees X
7 Phyllis to block: “Something Joan Crawford wore in the film “Mildred Pierce” made American housewives all over the country copied.
Shoulder Pads
J.J. Agrees O “Also the San Diego Chargers”
8 Jim to block: “According to a recent survey of prominent clergymen, is it okay for a gambler to pray for good luck?”
Guess: No
Jerrod Disagrees WRONG
9 Jim to win: “According to statistics, this is the most popular instrument among amateur musicians. What is it?”
Guess: Guitar
J.J. Agrees X (Piano)
10 Fred to decide: “In a popular song, they say that leather is tough, but this girl is tougher. And she like to see men suffer.”
“I want a girl just like the girl that married dear old Dad. What am i sayin”
Answer: Hard-Hearted Hannah
Jerrod agrees WIN!

Round 4 Prize: Spalding Executive Golf Clubs

1 Jerrod to start:
Tom: “In a movie, who is famous for saying “Gotta Dance, Gotta Dance””
“Peg Leg Bates”
Gene Kelly
Jerrod agrees X (From “Singin’ in the Rain”)
2 Paul: “According to Ann Landers, who should you complain to about an unsatisfactory piece of meat.”
“No one, it’s hereditary”
HONK!
Guess: The manager
J.J. agrees WRONG (The Waiter)

J.J.’s Total (with Parting Gifts): $3,700
Jerrod’s Total: $8,350

Closing: Fred Willard is appearing in the movie “First Family”. Also featured are Bob Newhart, Gilda Radner, Harvey Korman and Jim Benjamin.

Images of game board based on original by FromEquestria2LA on Deviantart.

Hollywood Squares is owned by King World Productions a part of CBS Media Ventures.

HOLLYWOOD SQUARES-October 19, 1980

Host: Peter Marshall
Announcer: Kenny Williams

O: Pam Molosca (Fairview Heights, OH, Flight Attendant)
X: Ken Bosket (Detroit, MI, Attending Vegas Community College and Father of Three)

In this version, our players aren’t playing for cash. Each game is worth a prize. No Secret Square games The player who wins the most games wins the grand prize of the day AND moves on to a $100,000 tournament. More about that later.

ROUND 1 Prize: Broyhill French Provincial Bedroom Ensemble

Ken’s first
1 George: True or false? Sophia Loren is a wanted person in Italy.
“Just what she needs another bust! Like a turtle needs a brassiere”
Guess: True
Ken Agrees X
2 Lee: According to the song, Hear the wind Blow dear, Hear the Wind Blow” where?
Guess: Down in the Valley
Pam disagrees X
3 Paul: In the bible, does the Lord ever say that he hates anybody?
Guess: Yes
Ken Agrees X (Two chances to win)
4 Linda, HUH? (Should’ve stuck with Bill to Block)
Who said you’re never fully dressed without a smile?
Guess: Will Rogers
Pam Disagrees O
5 Jim for the Win: True or false? Does a religious group in the South Pacific that, believe it or not, praise everyday to Donald Duck.
Well, Jim says he’s a Frisbee-terian, who worships Frisbees and believe that when you die, your soul is stuck on the roof.
Guess: True
Ken Disagrees WIN! (Scoreboard simply displays an X or O on their scoreboard when they win a round)

Round 2 Prize: Whirlpool Fridge, Dishwasher and Electric Range ($1,899)

For Today’s Big Winner: $4,400 Total
* 7-Day Carnival Caribbean Cruise
* Funky! Dresses
* Trip to Miami (1wk. @ Newport)
* Kenya 14k Gold Earrings, Ring and Tie Tack
* Konica FS1 Single Reflex Camera

Pam to Start
1 Paul: We get it by a Himalayan goat and lots of people want to have it. What is it?
“Twinkie Filling”
Guess: Roquefort Dressing
Pam Disagrees O (Cashmere)
2 George: True or false? There are now up to 50 parts of the body that can be replaced.
“Don’t try to install them yourselves.”
Guess: True
Ken Agrees X
3 Jim: According to the book Lifespans, how long should a good guitar last within 10 years?
Jim played guitar instead of football, and he can kick a guitar 60 yards
Guess: As long as you do, about 100 years
Pam Disagrees O (200 Years)
4 Lee to Block: According to Weight Watchers, a person’s middle years are from 35 to what?
Guess: At least 50
Ken Agrees X
5 Linda: According to Weight Watchers, is it a good or bad idea to exercise in the nude?
Guess: Good Idea
Pam Agrees O
6 Ann to Block: What heavenly body does man know more about that any other?
“Marilyn Monroe”
Guess: The Sun
Ken Disagrees X (The Earth)
7 David to block: True or false? Fish Burp
“I’m thinking who the idiot was who found out about this? What an occupation”
Guess: False, but they barf
Pam Agrees WRONG (One in South America can burp loud enough to be heard a mile away)
8 David to Win: True or false There are exercises for you to do while you are on your death bed.
Three, Swing a burping fish above you head, never close your eyes and move your lips to say “You’re all out of the will”
Guess: True
Ken Agrees WIN!

Round 3 Prize: Soundesign Disco Stereo

Ken Starts
1 George: Jogging has been found effective for many things.  Has it been found effective in treating a hangover?
George says he’s had hangovers you could frame.
Guess: No
Ken Agrees X
2 Lee: True or False: According to research at Yale, even just looking at food can make fat people fatter.
“Looking at a donut makes it go from hand to thighs”
Guess: True
Pam Disagrees X
3 Wayland and Madame (“I’m gonna start looking at the hole in the donut”)
True or false? A man in France recently ate an entire bicycle.
“Now that’s what I call ruffage!”
Guess: False
Ken Agrees O
4 Bill: In 1947, they took away several big chunks of India and called them what?
New Delhis, all over New York
No Answer. Ken is offered to guess himself, but he declines for a new question. (Pakistan)
B: You are two stories tall, weigh 20 tons, a six inch tooth, look like a huge ugly kangaroo with a great lashing tail, and loves meat for dinner.  What do we call you?
“Sounds like my mother-in-law”
Guess: Dinosaur
Pam Disagrees X (Two shots)
5 Paul to block: After doing this seven times, the Pope said enough for a while, what was the Pope doing?
“Personally hearing a confession from Ann Margaret”
On tour doing communions
Ken disagrees O (Judges rule Paul was close enough to touring)
6 David who hold the win for both: According to Gallup, this is the one food teenagers hate more than any other food.
Guess: Broccoli
Pam Disagrees WIN! (Spinach)

Round 4 Prize: Apple II Computer ($1,195)

Pam’s turn
Paul: Something really, really awful happened began July 1, 1863 and continued off and on for three days.
It’s Not the David Letterman Show. (Heh-Heh-Heh, payback for how HS was canceled on NBC)
Can’t think of anything before the buzzer sounds “Thank God” (It Was The Battle of Gettysburg)

We still have a computer to give away so we’ll go to another question. If Pam gets it, she ties the match. If not, Ken is the champ.
Who wrote the classic WWII novel, the Naked and the Dead James Jones, Leon Uris or Norman Mailer?
Guess: Jones
Pam Agrees WRONG (Mailer)

Pam’s Total (with Parting Gifts): $1,650
Jim’s Total: Around $8,600

Jim will eventually return to play in the big tournament. Grand prize package totaling $100,000! Includes:

  • $20,000 Cash
  • Domes America Geodisic House
  • Coachmen 17.5 ft. Crestline Travel Trailer

Images of game board based on original by FromEquestria2LA on Deviantart.

Hollywood Squares is owned by King World Productions a part of CBS Media Ventures.