Ah, but Arlene all of those things I have done, none of them compares with working with you on What’s My Line? and the rest of our very charming panel.
What things?? We don’t know, Buzzr clipped the intro again.
FIRST GUEST: Rufus Harley (Philadelphia, PA)
He’s self-employed and deals with a service.
Soupy: With what you’re wearing, would that have to do with what you do? (Afro-centric outfit) It IS what he wears, but it’s not necessary $5 Meredith: Do you work for a profit-making organization? Forgot the self-employed bit, she gets a pass. Can your services be provided for both men and women? Yes Do you entertain people in any way? Yes Indoors more than outdoors? Both, though mostly indoors. Not important, though. Do people watch you? Yes You don’t touch people in any way? No means Yes Do you hold anything in your hand? Yes Can you perform on a nightclub stage? Yes When you have this thing in your hand, can you also move it away? Yes Are you a juggler? No $10 Gene: Does who he do involve music? Yes Is his instrument in the string family? No $15 Arlene: Is it a pipe? Hmmmm, yes Do you hold it in your mouth? Yes Something other than the flute? Yes Would knowing the instrument be essential? Yes “An instrument that we are not so accustomed to seeing in our orchestra?” Yes In the Kazoo Family? No $20 Soupy, going through all of what Arlene has found out: Are you a clarinet player? No $25 Meredith: The instrument longer than a whistle? Yes Do you play a recorder and cobras come up? No $30 Gene: An instrument that the Western World is familiar with? Yes 30 second warning Is it a recorder? No $35 Arlene with a final question: Does your costume bely the quality of the instrument, by that I mean is it anything like a bagpipe…
ARLENE DOES IT AGAIN! Yes, Rufus PLAYS BAGPIPES, Jazz bagpipe. He’s part of a four-piece combo and the American Federation of Musicians. Plus, he’s the only Left-Handed Bagpiper And of course, we have a performance.
SECOND GUEST: Bob Krugman (Chicago, IL)
He’s self-employed and deals with a product.
Arlene: Would I be interested in your product? Possibly Be interested for a man? No $5 Soupy: Would it be good for an animal? No $10 Meredith: Does your product come in contact with the body? Yes Is it other than clothing? Absolutely not (No Means NO this time) $15 Gene: Is it an expensive product?
Does it change the appearance of the individual involved? Hopefully In the cosmetic field? No $20 Arlene: Is it anything in the massage field? No $25 Soupy: Benefit from the body up? Sometimes “I’m beginning to understand you” Soupy Passes Meredith: When someone wears this product, can you see it? Yes it’s not undergarments Is it an accessory rather than a whole thing? No $30 Gene: Is it made of animal substances? Sometimes Can also be made out of plastics? In the broad sense A harness? No $35 Arlene: Would I be interested in buying for an animal? No $40 Soupy: Would a woman wear this more than a man? Definitely, Passes Again Meredith (who was thinking Strait Jacket at one point): is it a bikini bathing suit? No $45 Gene: Is it decorative? Yes Do you design the ones you make? Yes Is it made of fabrics? Yes Are they NOT utilitarian? Yes means NO! Game over
Arlene would’ve gotten it: Bob makes MATERNITY CLOTHES, owner and designer of Plus One. Or Plus One Etc. depending on how many children a mother has. Before this, he was a stage actor and rock singer.
MYSTERY GUEST
Wally figures it’s okay to cut the panel 30 seconds, since this one is so well known. (2 1/2 Minutes Total)
Meredith: Are you in the entertainment business? “You might say that” (Sounds like Paul Lynde) Gene: Are you primarily an actor? No Arlene: Are you in the theater? No Soupy: Are you known mostly for television? “Sort of” Meredith: Have you ever had your own television series? Yes Gene: Do you sing? “Sort of” (Deep-voiced) Arlene: Are you singing someplace around New York at the present time? Yes (About to burst) Soupy: Would this be in a nightclub? Yes and No Meredith: Are you also known for your recordings? Yes Gene guesses Mel Torme…RIGHT!
Mel was nervous after he did an interview with Patrick O’Neal. When O’Neal asked about lunch, Mel let him know off the record. Pat joked that he was on the panel. Soupy talks about a special Mel did with the Marty Page Group. Gene was amazed Mel could disguise his voice.
Closing: Looking back on the past week, Wally points out some great highlights. Soupy learning Yoga, Meredith’s father as a mystery guest and Arlene’s amazing skills. She doesn’t take all the credit for the work.
Host: Wally Bruner Announcer: Johnny Olson Celebrity Panel:
Soupy Sales
Meredith MacRae
Gene Rayburn
Arlene Francis
FIRST GUEST: Debbie Kath (Roseville, MN)
She deals with a service and is self-employed.
Soupy: Is it a service I might come to you for? Yes A service in some way or manner touch me? She says yes but after a conference No! $5
Meredith: In your service, do you instruct people? No $10
Gene: Is this a practical service? Yes Is it in the cultural field? No $15
Arlene: Is your service for human beings? Yes Could they ever come to you more than one at a time? Yes Do you work indoors? No $20
Soupy: Do you instruct in any way? Been there, done that! Do it have to do with sports? Yes Is it unusual for you compared to a man? Yes Is this a national sport, or seasonal like football or baseball? No $25
Meredith: Is it a team sport? No $30
Gene: “Do you put the shot?” No $35
Arlene: When you’re involved, are balls involved in some way? No $40
Soupy: Is this a sport where animals would be involved? No (Last Chance)
Meredith: Do you hold something or move something with your hands? Yes Are you involved with chess or bridge? Game Over
Debbie Kath is the youngest female hot air BALLOONIST in the world. And she does instruct, but it’s not her basic job. Ballooning is more about advertising and putting on a show. She can stay up around an hour “while my gas holds up.” (No Fart Jokes, please) All this started after writing a paper for 8th grade about “Stratospheric Research”. Busy for a 19 y.o., Debbie is also her hometown “Miss Roseville.” As for airplane, coming here was her first flight.
NEXT GUEST: Eddie Pulaski (“Fun City”, NY)
He’s self-employed and deals with a product.
Arlene: Is it a useful product? Yes A product one would find in a home? No
Soupy: A man would use rather than a woman? Yes If I wore it, would I look different? Yes Something that would approve my appearance from the waist up? Yes Do you have anything to do with beards? Yes Do you sell fake beards? YES (AND MUSTACHES)
Soupy’s FINALLY GOT ONE THIS WEEK! Mr. Pulaski been at this for a year. He gets many young men who can’t grow their own facial hair. Other clients work in banks or other places that don’t allow it. Eddie’s new career followed 30 years being a barber. Indeed, Gene was a customer and would’ve disqualified himself.
Onto the demonstration, Eddie puts a businessman type on Wally. “It’s a bit difficult to breathe.” Before going to Soupy and Gene, Eddie reveals his fake hair…including his head. He makes hairpieces, too! Soupy (Diabolical, Mitch Miller) and Gene (“Gilded The Lily”)
MYSTERY GUEST
Gene: Are you wearing a beard? Yes (still can’t tell man or woman) Arlene: Is it your own beard? Yes Soupy: Do you have a television show? No Meredith: Are you known primarily for motion pictures? No Gene: Are you an author? Yes, among other fields. Arlene: Are you also a musician? Not particularly Soupy: Are you also an actor? Yes Meredith: Have you ever appeared on Broadway? No Gene (who thought he had it): Are you inscrutable? Yes (both in bad Chinese impressions) Arlene: Have you done any records? Yes Soupy: Do you currently have a record that’s a best-seller? No Meredith: Did you ever have a partner? No, under a minute Gene: Do you have a mustache? Yes Arlene: The last time I saw you, were you not smooth-shaven? Yes Did you write “Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah” Yes IT’S ALLEN SHERMAN
Wally declares it’s time to take the fake mustaches off. Allen’s is real! A staff member tried to pull it off backstage. Among other things (writer for “I’ve Got a Secret”) he’s casting a comedy musical for Broadway. His last record “Togetherness” was released about a year prior. Wally recounts a story about Allen and his maid in California. He’d just been fired from “The Steve Allen Show” They were trying to decide who should file for unemployment pay. The other would’ve had to clean the house.
Closing: Big news, Arlene has been elected to the United States Hall of Fame in Washington. To add to that, her son Peter is in Phi Beta Kappa in college.
Host: Wally Bruner Announcer: Johnny Olson Celebrity Panel:
Soupy Sales
Meredith MacRae
Gene Rayburn
Arlene Francis
FIRST GUEST: Miss X
She’s self-employed and deals in a service. (Wally forgets to show the audience the answer
1 Gene: Is it a physical activity? Yes Do you wear a certain costume when you perform? Yes Is it in the general field of entertainment? Yes Is it something that might go on in New York? Yes Could I do it with you? Yes “Would you like to meet me after the show?” Yes (OH-OH!) Would it be a pleasurable experience? Yes “You do your show and I’ll do mine!” Would it be remunerative to you? Yes (There’s some compensation for her) Would it change my physical appearance? “It Could” but for the most part, No $5
2 Arlene: Is it a good idea to have music playing? Yes Does dancing come into it in anyway? Yes Are you a go-go dancer or belly dancer? THE SECOND ONE
And Miss X’s real name is…LITTLE EGYPT! The Little Egypt, great granddaughter of the original who performed at the Chicago World’s Fair in 1893. This Little Egypt has been performing since five, but in nightclubs for about 6 1/2 years. And it pays extremely well…SHOCKER! Wally decides to pay her well by awarding the entire $50.
She went out the wrong way. Should I go get her?
Gene
SECOND GUEST: The Rev. Dale Lend (former assistant pastor of St. Peter’s Lutheran Church)
While attending school for his Masters at New York Theological Seminary, he’s in an occupation. It’s salaried and deals with a service.
1 Arlene: Have anyone ever called you a “swinging minister”? Yes Are you interested in new music? Yes, but it might lead you on the wrong path. Wally lets it go. Since it ruined her plan, Arlene will pass. NOW it’s a No $5
2 Soupy: “You’re the guys who originated turtlenecks” Something concerned with entertainment? No $10
3 Meredith: Does it involve teaching? No $15
4 Gene: Is it a full-time job? Yes Are people’s lives benefited in any way? Perhaps (Let the laughter begin) Sex involved? Yes Families? Mmmm….No $20
5 Arlene: Do you move around from place to place? No $25
6 Soupy: Something that I might come to you? Yes If I had this problem, would I have a problem? Perhaps If I came to you over a period of time, would it change my outlook? The Rev. thinks so When a person finishes coming to you, are they liable not to bother with a particular vice? Gambling, drinking, wild wild women? Yes Do you deal with alcoholics? Sometimes, Soupy Passes
7 Meredith: Are you involved with gambling or card playing? No $30
8 Gene: Do you work with young people or teenagers? (Arlene: “Alcoholic teenagers”) No $35
9 Arlene: Does psychology have anything to do with you job? Psychology made fit in to any job, but overall in this case, No! $40
10 Soupy: Anything to do with Alcoholics Anonymous? No $45
11: Meredith: Do you come in contact physically? Game Over $50
The Rev. must confess: He’s a BARTENDER. He works at Mr. Lacy’s in NYC for the last seven months and graduated from the International Bartending School. No, Arlene it’s not a milk bar. And at the job, Dale’s Reverend Uniform stays at home. On Sunday, he preaches at various congregations as a fill-in. It’s a way to relate to people he wouldn’t meet at work.
MYSTERY GUEST
1 Meredith: Are you in the entertainment business? Yes (sounds like Donald Duck) 2 Gene: Are you an actor? Yes 3 Arlene: Are you also a singer? Yes 4 Soupy: Are you currently starring on your own television show? No 5 Meredith: Are you my father? YES, Gordon MacRae
Gordon’s been doing that “Donald” voice since Meredith’s been a baby. Now he’s doing it with her 2-month-old daughter, Amanda. He was hoping Meredith would catch on, since only Rich Little can do it better. (What about Clarence Nash?) The proud father dotes on his other daughter, Heather. She’s appearing in a movie and previous in a show called “Here’s Where I Belong” Truthfully, Gordon and the missus never gave advice about going into show business. He didn’t even know when Meredith got her first TV role in “My Three Sons”. The girls discovered it for themselves. Meredith said they’d preferred she’d become an English teacher.
Closing: Gene is a Yachtsman. Living in Long Island Sound, he was surrounded by boat races, but only got into it 3-4 years. Moving to Cape Cod, Gene bought a 13 ft. Fiberglas Catamaran and discovered the thrill of sailing against the elements.
He was in a yacht just the other day. He chased his girl around the deck for three hours.
Soupy
Gene gets more time with boats that he did with flying a plane.
The stalling ends so we could get to the real show: Little Egypt showing her stuff!
And I tell you, Arlene, it’s much better being here than Saigon.
Wally’s intro, with no context (Why’d you delete the panelists intros, Buzzr??!)
FIRST GUEST: Esteene Del Rio (Chicago, IL)
Some strong whistling as Esteene signed in. She’s self-employed and deals with a product.
Gene: Does what you do bely your physical appearance? Yes Would I come to you? Yes Would it make me happy? Yes Would it cost me a great deal of money? No $5
Arlene: Is the product edible or coatable? Neither $10
Soupy: Would it help my home? We don’t know what kind of problems Soupy has in his home, but generally No $15
Meredith: Does it come in contact with the body? Yes Is it other than clothing? Yes means No $20
Gene: Are there animals other than humans that use the product? Yes “I concluded that” Household pets Yes Canine family? Yes Is it edible? No $25
Arlene: Would the canine wear it? Yes Wear it on the head or neck? Sometimes Does it cover a certain area? Yes Do you make raincoats, fur coats or dresses? ALL OF IT
She designs fashions for dogs, including mini skirts. Selling to department stores, grooming shops out of cloth and paper and. Prices go up to $500, the lowest Wally said was 298. ($298 or $2.98?) Time for a fashion show!
Shelly and Gigi are wearing psychedelic Lame line, changing full-length gown and a mini. Gene decides to help the human model transform. In her hand is Celito, both wearing paper embossed fabric. It’s totally disposable! (The other was cleanable.)
After the break, Wally offers Arlene a fitting for that special outfit; Arlene was more into the dog’s hair
SECOND GUEST: Bernice Gera (Indiana, PA)
She’s self-employed and deals with a service.
Soupy: Is it a service I might come to you for? Perhaps A service I’d come to you rather than you come to me? A reluctant Yes A service that would help physically? It might Would it make my house a better house? Definitely No $5
Meredith: Do you wear a uniform? Yes Is what you do instructive? To a degree, Yes Do you work indoors more than outdoors? Outdoors, So No $10
Gene: He gathers it’s more utilitarian than aesthetic? Yes Anything to do with food? No $15
Arlene: Can we rule out sports? No $20
Soupy: So it can be sports? Yes Is it a sport? Yes Is it a sports with both men and women? Wally’s explanation flew over my head like it did Soupy’s Bottom Line: No $25
Meredith with another wild guess: Are you a girl’s gymnastics instructor? Not this time $30
Gene: The people that come to you benefit physically? Debatable, but Wally makes it No $35
Arlene: Is it a team sport? Yes A sport indulged by men a great deal? Yes Even more than women? Yes Usually a man’s job? Yes If you’re not a instructor, are you a lady umpire? YES
Mrs. Gera work for semi-pro with police departments. She next wants to get into real minor league baseball. And she used to play, hitting 350 footers! You could see her in live demonstrations around NYC with real Major Players such as Roger Maris. Problems in regular stadiums include lack of a dressing room. Soupy says she’d be a good cook because she can dust off the plates! Anyway, Bernice is mostly a base umpire so she doesn’t wear the chest protector. A new one is being designed for her. Mrs. Gera leaves us with her “YOU’RE OUT!”
MYSTERY GUEST
Arlene: Does one find you in the entertainment pages A Deep Yes Soupy: Associated with Television rather than Broadway? High Yes Meredith: Are you a comedienne? yes Gene: Are you appearing on Broadway? No Arlene: Do you appear on your own show? Teary No Soupy; Is there just one of you? Now Yes Meredith: Have you been associated with another person? No Gene: Are you Joan Rivers? YES
And she was afraid they’d never figure her out. Gene has worked with her so often, he’s recognized her voice, despite all her attempts. Exclusively here on What’s My Line?, Joan announces her upcoming talk show. She promises it won’t compete with this show. Tapings start in two weeks. Being on the Tonight Show has been her big career boost. From seven bucks a week working office temp, her salary has skyrocketed…up to $12 a week. Joan also mentions the “Upstairs at the Downstairs” club where she works with her husband. They also have a seven-month-old to watch. Wally gets Joan to talk about writing her material. Soupy mentions how few women are out there in comedy. “Don’t get me started” “Show them your Mickey Mouse (watch) ” “I’ve gotta give it more cheese”.
Joan: Show them your Mickey Mouse (watch) Soupy: I’ve Gotta give it more cheese
Closing: Soupy’s history with throwing pies. It started in Cleveland in 1950, and in those days, he’d whip up eggs or cream. One director gained lots of weight from eating offset. Many stars have gotten “creamed” by Soupy including Frank Sintara, Burt Lancaster, Tony Curtis, Shirley Maclaine and Jimmy Durante. There’s also a plug for his 25th High School reunion at West Virginia.
Arlene: Might I possibly have this product? You Could Used by both sexes? Yes Does it come in contact with the person? No $5
Soupy: Found in the home? Yes Found in one room more than another? Probably, but Wally calls it a No $10
Anita: Could I hold it in my hand? Yes Comes in contact with other places beside the hand? No $15
Bert: Is this product functional? “It Lives” Bert heard it, but Francis and Wally deny it.
Go on, you big stoop!
Does it do something? Yes Does it perform a task for the home? Not necessarily $20
Arlene: Is this product is or has every been alive? Yes In the animal family? Yes Is it a pet? “It Can Be” Is it a Bird? Yes Is it a Canary or Parakeet? (There’s a difference) Canary Does it talk? No $25
Soupy: “He gains 300 pounds and hollers CHEEP?” Not a question Do you train canaries? Yes
“They kamikaze canaries. They throw themselves in cat’s mouths?”
Train them to sing? YES
Our bird expert has brought a quartet of his class of 60! Yes! 60! Johnny O. brings them out, after they’ve been flying around the dressing room. Wally says a cat stood by in case they got rowdy. Francis has no problem living with ’em all By listening to what the mic was picking up, they are have bass voices. Wally needs to bring them closer. All you can do is give them time to work out their stage fright. In a contest, birds get up to a half a hour to perform!
Our birds have gotten a little better. In other knowledge, Francis uses a graduate canary to train students. But with only a little taste, another group of birds serenade us. (The Panel)
SECOND GUEST: Dianna Engel (New York City)
She’s salaried and deals with a service.
Soupy: Would I come to you? Yes (Bert: Can I come with you?)
Are you wearing something other than what you’re wearing? (Dianna has a typical 60s floral dress) No $5
Anita: Would I use it too? Yes Would I enjoy it as much as Soupy? Aside from some side benefits, Yes Do you touch people? No $10
I’m so sorry to hear that?
Bert
Would you say this service would make me feel better? No therapeutic benefit but Yes Would I need an appointment? No $15
Arlene: Are you employed with others in the same line? Yes
A place where one might wants some relaxation? Dianna says Yes but Wally doesn’t think so. Arlene’s getting miffed, so it’s a Yes Do they serve anything to eat or drink? A definite No $20
Soupy: Is there an office? Yes Do you do any paperwork? Yes Do people come that have a particular problem involving paperwork? Dianna was unsure, but time’s up anyway
Arlene guesses it’s a cashier. Soupy guesses a hostess on a patrol wagon. Both wrong! She’s a STOCKBROKER. Her company is Kern Securities. How did a nice girl like you get in a business like this? She just started investing, got good and decided to spread the knowledge. And the men don’t see to mind if you earn their respect. Soupy and Bert are in for sure.
MYSTERY GUEST
The guest welcomes us in a voice sounding like Julia Child.
“It’s one of my mother’s favorite shows and one of the birds is loose backstage.
Bert: Are you primarily known for television? Yes, giggling with excitement Arlene: Do you have your own series? Yes Soupy: A nighttime show? No Anita: Afternoon talk show? No Bert: Game Show? Yes Arlene: Are you the moderator? “Yes, and I’m so beautiful”
Soupy: GENE RAYBURN, everyone knew it.
Gene says he’s done plenty of voices with his wife…
IT WASN’T A JOKE, A BIRD IS LOOSE!
Anyway, Mrs. Rayburn says Gene has a certain tone in his voice. The only option was Falsetto. The entire panel has been on “The Match Game”. Along with all those game shows and #1 DJ in New York, what’s left? Two Things: Create a starring role in Broadway and movie. After that, he’ll quit! ANYTHING BUT THAT! Reminisicing about past What’s My Line appearances, there was the time Gene milked a cow with the boy from Illinois. One of the most popular things fans talk about. Soupy says the cow should’ve gotten kid gloves, Gene’s got the coldest hands in the business. Cold Hands, Warm Personality!
Honest Answers:
Marsha Robbins (New Rochelle) for Soupy: “Do you really wear a Mickey Mouse watch?” Answer: Yes, and we get the closeup to prove it. When it slows down, he feeds it cheese
For Bert: “What was your occupation before you became an actor?” Answer: Played in the Philadelphia Phillies farm system
Arlene: Do you have any dogs? Answer: Not currently, but there used to be Otto Von Bismarck (Dacushand), Sheep dog, Scottie, Russian Wolfhound.
Wait, what about the canary! He flew to the top of the lights and finally began to sing. Don’t call the Humane Society, the bird’s back in safe hands.
Arlene: Is it a product those on the panel might use? Yes Used in the home? No $5
Soupy: Are we blindfolded because we’d recognize your face? No $10
Phyllis: Would I use it in contact or inside my body? In Contact Would it better or enhance me? Not necessarily, but close enough. If it did want it’s supposed to do, would I be better? Nothing could improve her, but it’s a Yes? Something you rub on your skin? A Clear No $15
Gawn: If I didn’t have the blindfold, would I guess what it was? Doesn’t help, doesn’t hinder, can’t take it off Would it come in contact with the skin above my neck? Yes Anything to do with makeup? No $20
Arlene: Something that is worn from the neck up? Yes Something worn on the face? Yes Worn in the area of the eyes? Yes (After a whisper from Gawn) Do you make blindfolds? Yes, the very ones the panel is wearing right now.
Gary’s company, Eve’s Costume Company, has been making blindfolds for “What’s my Line?” for many years. These blindfolds are custom, made not to mess up the panelists’ hair and eyes. There’s a special wide plastic and velvet lining and pearls for the ladies. The price Gary is keeping for a secret. When not making blindfolds, he’s making hats for movies and Broadway, occasionally other costumers, too. Most of the business is in the theatre, but it keeps him busy. Gary started in fashion design in Europe, but hats were the easiest.
Now a question for Gawn, what do you call blindfolds in England? “Eye-peeper stoppers” Yeah, he’s serious, and there are also “you-peeper stoppers.”
You would have an you-peeper stopper and I would have a I-peeper stopper. But it you put it on me, it would be a I-peeper stopper and if I put it on you, it would be a you-peeper stopper on top of an I-peeper stopper.
Easy to follow
SECOND GUEST: Mr. X (New York City)
He’s self-employed and dealing with a service. There’s another hint, Mr. X deals with fire.
Soupy ponders it might be roasting marshmallows. Is it connected with show business? In the broadest sense, maybe, but let’s not lead Soupy down the “Primrose Path” as Wally says. Do you give any demonstrations with fire? Many Do you got to schools or public functions talking about this? No $5
Phyllis: Can I rule out eating or spiting fire? Yes You clearly don’t start fires or work for the fire dept.? Indeed Anything to do with cooking? No $10
Gawn: People come to see you, do you instruct? No $15
Arlene: Do people come to see you entertain? No $20
Soupy (who can’t hold back laughter): If you had signed your name, would we know you? Yes Is there a product related to this service? No, which has already been established. Soupy’s safe, but Wally is really to flip Is it Performed outside? No $25
Mr. X, I come to where you are for some reason I can’t imagine to see you do something with or about fire?
Phyllis, getting down to basics
Despite her objection, No $30
Gawn: You don’t do anything with it, but you talk to me about it? No
By this point, Wally recognizes the panel is completely lost. GAME OVER! Arlene guesses he rubs two boy scouts together to make fire.
Mr. X is Paul Molay, a proprietor of a well-known NYC barbershop who STYLES MEN’S HAIR WITH FIRE. He uses fire to “groove it, to fit it out, to blend hair”. As weird as this sound, this practice dates back to Ancient Egypt. Wally volunteers Gawn, the “Pride of Piccadilly” to demonstrate. Johnny Olson brings out the chair. Soupy acts like a manicurist “Have you been in town long?” Paul is using a long white pole and singeing just the end.
“A Singe in time saves Nine” After a few seconds, Gawn gets to like it.
MYSTERY GUEST
More “Eye-Peeper Stopper Fun”. Our guest gets a good long applause.
Phyllis: Is there more than one of you? No (just someone who needs a lozenge)
Gawn: Primarily known as a singer? Yes (almost old lady like now)
Arlene: Singer in Television? Yes, well-known for television among other fields
Soupy: Biggest fame from records? It’s an element of fame, that or many records produced for the public.
Phyllis: In the New York Theater? No
Gawn: Do you have a record on the Hit Parade now? Yes
Arlene: Are you a man performing in nightclubs? Yes
Soupy: Are you in New York at the current time? No
Phyllis: Does your new record include the song “Those were the Days”? No (30 seconds)
Gawn: Is it single, not an LP, in the Hit Parade? Needed a bit of silent thought and clarification. Wally decides that our mystery guest has both right now.
Arlene: Are you known as a soul singer? YES, right in the description
Soupy: JAMES BROWN! OH, YES!
Great voice acting to hide his identity. Brown gives an “I Tried” that scratches the microphone. Going back to his time as a D.C. newsman, Wally shares the story of how James Brown ended a “Crisis” down there to a “happy conclusion”. Arlene mentions his time in Boston doing the same thing.
Honest Answers:
For Phyllis: Alice Graven of Atlanta, GA “Aren’t you married to a songwriter and what did he write?”
Answer: Yes, her husband Adolph Green, along with Betty Comdon, Julia Stile and Leonard Bernstein. “Bells are Ringing”, “The Party’s Over” “Just in Time” “Make Someone Happy” and “Hallelujah, Baby”
For Arlene: Barbara Middleman of Boston, MA “Where did you meat your husband Morton Gable and was it love at first sight?”
Answer: Definitely not, they met while he was the lead on a radio program. She used to be scared to death of him, now it’s vice versa.
Arlene: Work for a profit-making organization? Yes Work indoors? Usually Do people come to you for your service? They can Available to both men and women? Yes Regular hours, 9 to 5? It could be, but not too important Do you move around in your job? Yes Are you in a form of vehicle? No $5
Soupy: Do you wear a uniform, other than street clothes? Yes Is it for decoration or keeping from getting messed up? Ah, not a yes or no question. “I just like to get a right answer” Is there a product involved? No $10
Meredith: Would I come out with a degree, are you instructing me? One question at a time: The Instructing one Yes What about that degree, like judo for example? No $15
Gene: Is the uniform all white? No $20
Arlene: This instruction useful? Yes Is it athletic? In a broad sense, Yes Do you touch a person in any way? In this case, No $25
Soupy: You would never come to my house for this service? Perle doesn’t know, but more likely for a handsome gentleman like you Would it make me physically better? Yes A type of exercise? Could be Would it help me from the waist up? Yes, the whole body (“I don’t know what it is, but I need it”) Would I use it to lose weight? It might, Pass
Meredith: Would it take place in a gymnasium? It could Teach/instruct a personal fitness class? No $30
Gene: Could the panel come as a group and work all at once? Yes Do you ever wear a tutu? No $35 (You’ve never seen Gene in a tutu and you never will)
Arlene (who’s got a gleam in her eye): Do you ever work on or near water? No $40 (Down to 30 seconds)
Soupy: Do you come in contact with the body? Yes Are you a masseuse? No, Wally gives it up here
Meredith guesses wrong with fencing instructor. Perle is a YOGA INSTRUCTOR. (She did a demonstration, but it was clipped off by Buzzr)
SECOND GUEST: Henry Parcell (Manawon, NJ, near the shore in Central NJ)
He’s salaried and deals in a product
Soupy: Would I come to you? Possibly As opposed to coming to my house? Yes, way to sneak two questions in and stay in control. Would I feel better? No $5
Meredith: Used by both men and women? Yes Does it come in contact with the body? Yes Above the waist? No $10
Gene: Would it increase my physical well-being in any way? (uproar of laughter) No $15
Arlene: Product for anything other than the human race? No $20
Soupy: Stuck on not helping Gene, something I would use in the house? Yes In one particular room or floor? No $25
Meredith: Is one is able to wear this product? Yes Is it an undergarment? Yes, generally Is it a girdle? No $30
Gene: Must be something women wear more than men? NO $35
Arlene: Breaking down who and what can wear it. Do we rule out the Animal Kingdom? Yes Also from the waist up? Still No $40
Soupy: Something to help me walk or dance better? No $45
Meredith: Worn more by children? Yes, wants to pass to Arlene, but Gene’s in the way He blurts out “It’s Diapers” And Henry SELLS THEM.
Mr. Parcell works for the National Account Executive for Chicopee Mills Incorporated, a division of Johnson & Johnson.. All kinds of diapers, as long as they’re white. Soupy has a new slogan “We never mangle your baby’s triangles”
MYSTERY GUEST:
Meredith: Are you in the entertainment field? Yes (sounds of country bumpkin with a hiccup) Gene: Are you currently in New York? Yes Arlene: Are you playing in a Broadway play? Yes Soupy: Is there just one of you? Yes Meredith: Are you known for comedy as opposed to drama? No Gene: In your current appearance, do you sing? Yes Arlene: Is your wife in the show with you? No Soupy: Is there another male as your co-star? No Meredith with a guess: Joel Grey…RIGHT!
From one hit play to another “Cabaret” to George M”, it’s been a good year. Grey’s been in the business for 25 years, since age 11.
Closing: A chat with Meredith after figuring out who the mystery guest was. This was her first time on a game show panel. Meredith has also recorded her first record with her “Petticoat Junction” sisters along with solo records and live performances. It all started with “My Three Sons”, then a soap opera before “Petticoat” now in her third year. And it’s only her fifth year in show business.
We already learn he’s an usher right in this theatre and a college student. In between that, he’s salaried and working in a service.
Soupy (After a bit of rambling…) Does it have to do with show biz?
In the broadest sense, on the fringe (“He Makes Fringes”) It’s a Yes
Does it have to do with other people in showbiz?
No $5
Anita: Would I like to use your service?
Indirectly, same for Orson
It doesn’t matter if it’s a man or woman?
It doesn’t matter, Yes
When you perform, do people come to you?
Yes
Do you perform in a building?
Yes
Do you require a uniform?
Yes
Anita gets lost finding the next question: Do you use any equipment?
No $10
Orson (who thought Anita was talking instruments of torture): Would people come to you all alone?
No, which means your turn is over, Orson. $15
Arlene: You deal with groups of people?
More Than One
Do you instruct in any way?
James leans to No, but Wally needs a conference. There may be advice given, but there’s no degree of instruction. It’s still No $20
Soupy: Do you deal with groups other than people?
No $25
Anita: Do people hire you to take them around a building?
No $30
Orson: Is it a small group/number of people?
Yes
Would it be two?
Not necessarily
Would it help to know what you’re wearing?
Yes
Are you fully clad?
Yes
Wearing a suit like the suit and tie he’s wearing now?
No $35
Arlene: Anything athletic?
No, two to go and 15 seconds left
Soupy: Do you move around?
Another conference after James jumps with a No. Allegedly, he may have ups and downs.
Soupy: Do you have to touch anything to go up and down?
Wally brings this game to an end
If there’s anything James touches, it might be his nose going up and down the chimney. Mr. Proco is a DEPARTMENT STORE SANTA CLAUS. Specifically, at Lord & Taylor’s in NY, and it’s his second year. It took a while to learn how to get the voice down. We see some great looking pictures with a wide-eyed kid. Soupy asks if Jim every got a smack in the face. “Almost!”
Christmas is another story for the panel not figuring this out. In Soupy’s building, the elevator operator for 18 years is fired because the regular one came back.
SECOND GUEST: Charlotte Drury (Jackson Heights, NY)
After some applause from friends, we learn Charlotte is salaried, in services AND deals with a product
Arlene: A service I might use?
Yes
Requires some dexterity, for her to give it to me?
For the service itself, but let’s focus on the product
Is it a product you can hold it your hand?
No $5
Soupy with the age old Question: Is it bigger than a bread box?
Yes
A product used by men and women?
Yes
Does it touch the human body?
A quick no, then a conference changes it to Yes
Is it used in the home?
Definite No $10
Anita: Is it used in or near water?
Yes
Is it MUCH larger than a bread box?
Yes
Some sort of boat?
Yes
Do you operate this boat?
The boat is the product, she’s not involved in the operation. No leeway! $15 “It’s all yours, Orson”
Orson: Do you instruct in some way?
No $20
Arlene: Boats large enough for three or more passengers?
Yes
Are these decorated by you?
No $25
Soupy: Is it a dinghy?
Too small, “I’m pretty dinghy myself”, We’ll move on
Do you sell boats?
No $30
Anita: Arranging trips on boats?
Yes
Are you a travel agent?
Yes
Is it the liner around Manhattan?
Wally’s had enough! Charlotte RENTS YACHTS.
Mrs. Drury works for Wakefield Fortune Incorporated arranging cruises. A new service at the time, Charlotte has become a specialist in this field. Yachts all have their own crews. As you’d know from game show history, popular spots include the Caribbean, Mediterranean and Greek Isles. If Wally and the panel wanted a boat to rent, the smallest they could get would be about 54 ft. About $206 per person for one week including three meals a day. A larger, 200ft. power yacht on Mediterranean would take the whole studio. Total $12,000 a week per person. The interior is as fancy as any local hotel around here.
MYSTERY GUEST
A strong applause marks his/her arrival
Orson: May I assume that you’re in show business?
Yes
Arlene: Are you known for your work in the theater?
No
Wally says there are some you’d know this guest from theater, but primarily for something else.
Soupy: Would this activity be in motion pictures?
Yes
Anita: Do you live in this city, most of the time?
Wally doesn’t know for sure. In her business, she would be found in NYC sometimes.
Orson (30 sec. to go): Are you also in TV?
No, not at this moment
Arlene: Are you a singer?
Yes
Soupy: Did you earn your reputation in movies for musicals?
Yes
Anita: Are you in a musical picture right now?
No
Orson: A non-musical picture?
No, 15 seconds
Arlene: Are you appearing in a club or hotel in NYC?
Mark Rafferty (Staten Island, NY) for Anita: How tall are you? You seem so little, how do you get into mini-skirts?
Answer: 5’1” in stocking feet, but she often says 5’3”. And she buys clothes in the Junior Department. Not many mini-skirts, though
Larry Schmidt (Potsdam, PA) for Orson: “Where did you get the name Orson Bean?”
Answer: He made it up. His real name is Dallas Burrows which he said “Sounds Like a name a nut like Orson Bean would make Up” One last letter for “Souper Sales” but not enough time.
FIRST GUEST: John Garrity (Kenoshia, Brooklyn, NY)
John makes an edible product and is self-employed
Pia: Does it comes from some animal?
No $5
Gawn: In the line of sweeties (as we call candy?)
Yes
Would I lick it rather than chew it?
No $10
Arlene: Would other than human beings enjoy it?
No, or at least never find out $15
Soupy: Is it sold outdoors (like football games or parks)
Yes
Is it larger than an ice cream cone?
Yes
Is it like cotton candy?
No, no like cotton candy…IT IS COTTON CANDY!
1 out of 47 isn’t bad
Soupy
Mr. Garrity goes by the name “Johnny Cotton Candy”, same as Soupy’s Mother. It got started by a friend to pay tuition, he’s now a graduate student at St. John’s in American History. Soupy’s not done, he asks about the sugar base that’s put into the spinner. It’s PURE SUGAR! We get a full demonstration on stage. With a twist of the hand, BING! A Whip of pink magic! The panel walks over to try it out making “Q-Tips for the Jolly Green Giant” Soupy’s words again who gives himself a Santa Beard.
Note: Gawn calls it “Candy Floss”. Also, “Sweetie” doesn’t mean girls. The Brits call them Broads.
SECOND GUEST: Catherine W. Stone (Madisonville, KY)
She’s salaried and deals with a product.
Soupy: Is it a product I might use?
Yes
Would women use it more than men?
No $5
Pia: Likely found in the home?
No $10
Gawn: Am I assuming it has nothing to do with the derby?
Yes, nothing to do with horses
Might find it outside the home?
Yes
Anything to do with open air?
Tricky, considering the last question. Try another question, Gawn.
Anything to do with the elements?
No $15
Arlene: Any moving parts?
Gets an Ooh, then a No $20
Soupy: Something run by electricity?
No $25
Pia: Something I could hold in my hand?
Yes
Is it a useful product?
Yes
Would I have to buy it to use it?
Yes
Would I WANT to buy it?
If for some strange reason, Yes
Would it make me look better using it?
Nothing could $30
Gawn: More to do with children?
No $35
Arlene: Made of wood?
No $40
Soupy: Used in building or excavation?
Yes
It’s not a shovel, is it?
No (That wasn’t Soupy, that was the producer trying a ventriloquist act)
Soupy Passes
Pia: Used in my garden?
No $45, one to go
Gawn: Would it help hold things together?
Just the opposite, Soupy said the correct answer right after the last card flips: SHESELLS DYNAMITE$50
Employed by the Atlas Powder Company in Knoxville, we see a GIANT stick of commercial dynamite used for coal mines. Wally’s only used to the small type for fence post holes. Catherine says the type on stage could blow up the theatre, though it’s not the biggest bomb the theatre’s seen. HA! HA! HA! Our guest used to be a contractor who drilled those coal mines, and it took a lot of convincing for Atlas to hire her. Wally concludes that this is a business with many ups and downs.
MYSTERY GUEST
Arlene: Are you a name we’d find in the entertainment pages?
Yes (Light Falsetto)
Soupy: Are you on television?
Yes
Pia: Are you an actor?
Sometimes
Gawn: Comedian?
Mm-hmmm
Arlene: Do you sing?
Nhh-nhh
Soupy: Under 40 years old?
No
Pia: Deal with ethnic humor?
Yes
Gawn: Do you play an instrument?
Yes, Soupy thinks he’s got it
Arlene: Are you also a writer?
Yes
Soupy: Is it a violin? Are you Henny Youngman?
NO!
Pia: Jack Benny?
NO!
Gawn: Do you dance?
No
Arlene: Do you have a TV program?
No
Soupy: You don’t use the violin in your act?
That’s correct
Pia passes, Gawn: You write your own material?
Yes
Arlene: Are you humorous in one line or endeavor? (Irish, Jewish, etc.)
Not necessarily
Clue: His autobiography is a smash best-seller
Soupy jumps inwith Sam Levenson
YES!
Sam did play violin on TV, which he called “A great failure”. He never lived up to his mother’s dream. His autobiography is titled “Everything but Money”, which was a title Wally wanted for his book. “Everything but Money” meant Sam grew up with lots of love, books and music, but no money. Soupy points out Sam was a teacher before going into show biz. If he were a teacher today with a class of long hairs and wild clothes, would have sneakers on to leave in a hurry. But seriously, every generation has great potential, and the older people have the responsibility to keep them on the straight and narrow. We can all help each other and understand each other, regardless of ethnicity. As for music, Sam calls himself a “Long Hair of the Old School”. “You can become a howling success by just howling” The best he can do is find the roots of it all.
You can’t come to every idea with an open mouth. An open mind requires a little education.
Closing: Wally speaks with Pia, his former ABC news colleague. She was doing evening news in San Francisco, proving she’s more than just Ingrid Bergman’s daughter. They were recently in France visiting their own townhouse which is falling apart. Soupy Sales, meanwhile, has been going around in circles from what Wally’s heard. Actually, Soupy has circles around his eyes, while Arlene is going around the best circles.
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